


In The Arms Of The Lion

by SanguineHope



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Comforts, Cullen Rutherford Fluff, F/M, Fear, Nightmares, Peace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-03
Updated: 2015-07-03
Packaged: 2018-04-07 11:48:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4262220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SanguineHope/pseuds/SanguineHope
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a little excerpt of Nesira’s first week in skyhold and the nightmares that plague her mind from the events at Haven.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In The Arms Of The Lion

The troubles of Haven still haunted Nesira’s mind. She laid in her chambers where nothing could get her. The doors were shut and the darkness poured into the room as the night took over. With her eyes close it felt like the darkness was twisting around her like snakes, despair clouding her mind and bleeding into her shadows. There wasn’t anything Nesira could do in her sleep, she felt stuck, as if it was a dream she could not wake from, the shadows of her nightmares clinging to her mind with ever desperate attempt to breed fear into her heart. Sweat beaded over her brow as she twisted in her large bed alone for the night. Even with the moonlight glowing into her room, it wasn’t enough to save her from her nightmares. No guiding star and no helpful hand. All she had was a storm brewing.  
  
She could hear the laughter of Corypheus as he destroyed Haven, the way he watch the Inquisition burn as he tried to claim his prize she had taken from him. Another twist in her bed as she saw the dead piling underneath her feet. So many people lost, so many good men and women and even children who had taken refuge under the wings of the inquisition and she could do nothing to help. They died because of her. The overwhelming sense of guilt built inside of her dreams as the red lyrium dragon’s claws pressed against her body, pushing her into the ground of her dream. The roar echoed in her ears which turned into screams and cries of people.  
  
Seeing the Elder one so close left her paralyzed in her dream, each small sweeping movement he made leading to the fear of her heart. He was the hope and leader of the Inquisition but in her dreams, she was nothing but a failure. The ghost of fear was silent but ever waning over her. She felt everything disappear, though the echoing voice of the Elder one telling her she was a mistake, that she was nothing more than an accident. She never lost faith in her elven gods nor did she lose faith in the Maker. She knew she was meant for this, that she had come to the people in their greatest time of need but it didn’t help the doubt spreading in her mind like a plague that could not be cured.  
  
What woke her up was the screams of the dead once more in her mind, as her heart raced and the blood pumping through her veins. She shot up in bed, a terrible scream leaving her throat without even thinking about it. Everything rushed into her mind as she woke up with a start. Her entire body jerked and she felt a course of shaking over her skin. The scream lasted for only a few seconds but she felt as if her yell was blending into those screams of the dead. Those dreams were sharp as a knife and slicing through her body each time. She woke to find her body chilled yet sweating, all her confidence gone.  
  
**“Inquisitor!!”**  A husky voice called out as the door was slammed open and she her tactical advisor rushing forth as if he was on the battlefield. Her blurry tear filled eyes looked over toward him, unable to draw herself away for a moment. He had been so willing to die, and she couldn’t have that. In the Chantry she wasn’t saving just the people, she had to save him as well. But now there was nothing to save herself from, there was no way to save herself from the ongoing nightmares that plagued her mind.  
  
A shaky voice broke from Nesira’s throat.  **“I’m…I’m fine. I’m okay.”**  She said, as the broad shoulders of the man walked over toward her. She had never noticed just how powerful he looked even without his armor. She was surprised to see the etching of his muscles along his arms as the tunic sleeves fell along his body. **“Nightmare?”**  He asked simple, his voice already knowing what she was talking about.  **“I.. uh, yes.”**  She stuttered slightly, unable to act strong in front of him at the moment.  
  
The powerful movement of his appearance came toward her and sat on the edge of the bed, his hand touching her calf that rested underneath the heavy blanket. **“They won’t last forever, I promise Inquisitor.”**  His voice was soft and caring though the pain on his face was evident that he was having nightmares as well. Nesira had noticed this pain before but not as prominent as now. She wore a light dress, strapless along her shoulders and underwear underneath the dress. As if embarrassed, she pulled the covers over her body but at the moment she wasn’t really caring about that. It was the fact that he was here to make sure she was safe.  
  
**“Please, call me Nesira, or Nessie.”**  She pleaded as she shifted over in the bed closer to him. A living body, someone that had survived. She just felt like a failure even for all she had done.  **“Do you wish to talk about it Nesira?”**  He asked so calmly. This man, this wasn’t her tactical advisor or her Commander. This was a man who understood, the wisdom in his eyes glowing at her with such intense golden sheen. She found herself unable to break away as she moved closer, shifting so her legs hung off the bed not touching the floor like his were and held the covers around herself as she sat by him.  **“I…I failed.”**  She started, wiping tears away from her eyes with her hand and stared at the floor.  **“For all that everyone thinks I’ve done, I have failed. I watched as I was trying to heal Adan.”**  She paused, wondering if it was weird she knew some of the villagers names, but she did. She had always been keen to meeting people, learning who they were.  **“But the fire exploded and his screams, he burned to death. I could do nothing, I’m a mage and I could do nothing!”**  She felt her hands tightening over the blanket.  **“And then someone was in a building dying. The red templars overwhelmed use, I couldn’t save him, and once I got into the building, I found it was Lysette. His eyes, I can’t stop seeing his eyes.”**  Her hands were shaking now as she looked over to Cullen. His golden irises held such compassionate and concern it shocked her for a moment. She had never expected to see him looking at her like that.  
  
**“How can people look up to me when so many was lost again. First at the conclave and now Haven. It’s my fault, it’s always been my fault.”**  She was once more crying as she suddenly felt the strong embrace of Cullen wrap around her. He was careful, keeping his distance yet at the same time she could feel the comfort oozing from him, trying to help her. Somehow his small token of sympathy, it was enough to cause a way of tears to break from her mind as she leaned against him, burying her face into his shirt and the overwhelming waterfall of fear, angst, and pain leave her body through her tears. Cullen said nothing at the moment, just holding Nesira as his hand brushed along her head and then other around her back just holding her close, letting her know she wasn’t alone. It had been a little while as Nesira’s grief left her body until she sniffled and leaned up finally, brushing away her tears again.  
  
She looked up at Cullen, as he looked down at her and moved his arms away from her. She felt a lingering hope they would return, wanting the strong embrace of the man again but she couldn’t find the words to even ask.  **“I’ve felt your pain before, not in the same way but I’ve lost men, women, all my friends. It’s never easy and I can’t lie to you Nesira, it won’t get easier. But don’t forget that your friends are here for you and I…I’m here for you.”**  Nesira’s unique eyes blinked a few times as Cullen stood up.  **“I’ll leave you to your sleep Nesira, but I’ll be in the war room if you need me.”**  Nesira wondered if he was there cause he couldn’t sleep, and without thinking she reached over and grabbed his hand.  
  
**“Please –don’t leave. I can’t sleep. Can you stay with me?”**  Cullen at first looked confused as she looked down, her red hair falling around her face and along her ears and then back up toward him. But then he turned around and sat on the bed, his arm wrapping around her shoulder.  **“I won’t leave unless you tell me to.”** She found herself unable to hold back the smile, as she leaned up against his shoulder. She couldn’t find the will to close her eyes just yet, but being able to lean against him made her feel safe. His calm stoic personality was enough to warm her heart and the tender touch of his hand along her shoulder caused all her nerves to disappear. They sat in silence for awhile, as Nesira fought her sleep. Before she realize it though, she had fallen asleep, slipping into his lap and breathing calmly.  
  
Cullen sat there, looking down at the small elf who had fallen asleep, at first nervous to touch her but moved to rest his hand on her shoulder before shifting carefully to pick her up into his arms. He was respectful of what she wore, not gazing at her body but instead looking at her eyes. He stood up and twisted toward the bed laying her carefully down so that her head rested on the pillows and just as he moved to cover her with the blanket Nesira grabbed his arm. For a tiny hand, one unshaped by the handling of a weapon, it was firm and unweilding. A sign to not leave, and Cullen couldn’t bear to part from her side, not yet. She he covered her with the blanket and laid down on top of the blanket. A boundary of safety, yet his net of comfort still there.  
  
**“Do not worry Nesira, I’m not leaving your side ever.”**  He said softly even though she could not hear it as she was asleep.


End file.
